Dick in a Box VS. Great Moments In Hook Up History

In the blue corner ... wearing purple yellow and red peacock designed trunks weighing in at 12 Billion annual revenue ... we have the heavy hitting NBC backed SNL skit featuring 2389023 Grammy winner Justin "gay but not admitting it" Timberlake and Andy "wish I was Adam Sandler" Sandberg.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1dmVU08zVpA

And in the red corner.... wearing the FU shorts weighing in at 600 Million annual revenue we have the raucous gnarly do anything for a buck used to be Comedy Central backed Dave Chappelle show.
http://www.mypartypost.com/watchvideo/1013/Great_Moments_In_Hook_Up_History

Round 1 - watch the videos. Go ahead, I'll wait. They're hilarious.

Round 2 - which came first, the box or the popcorn? Is one a rip off of another?

If so - who would do such a thing? Or are they creative genius that are completely separate and distinct?

To use the parlance of Jack White, I think I smell a rat!

Here are the best facts that a 5 minute Google search can find: The SNL episode aired December 16, 2006. The Chappelle Show episode aired Wednesday March 12, 2003. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm............ I wonder where SNL got their idea????? But wait you say, there are no new ideas. So that means that someone else put their junk in a box first. Who would that be? Prove it.

For now I'm saying SNL ripped of Dave Chappelle and they need to give credit where credit is due.

Bust a Nerd-a-Con!

Yo Check it - sniggities.

This was my first trip to Comic-Con, even though I've lived in Whale's Vagina for nearly 7 years.

Zoltar says "Your Wish is Granted". WTF the rope cord is unplugged?

So I took a bunch of pictures of my faaaaavorite comic book heroes. I also took a bunch of pictures of the n3rdy toys. Yahhhh. About that. I think Ogre would have kiniption fitted all over the pliznace at the convention centre. Yah that's right, centre, not center.

WITHout further doo-a, allow me to present to you - the one, not the only, the Complexible Comic-Con Experience!

So the first thing to explain about Comic-Con San Diego 2007 is the floor plan with what booths are where and how to find all things related to the reason why you are here. Here's the map they give you:

I would insert quippy remarks here, but the map is very self explanatory.

Once you entered the Convention Centre, it was easy to find what or whom you were looking for. In fact, there was plenty of personal space to be found walking around. I think they need to try and attract more people to this "event". It was only sold out 4 of 4 days, and a mere 123,000+ were walking the floors. It was a ghost town.

But as you were walking around, there was plenty to see. The "stars" of the show were many. To many to count, in fact.

For example - present at the comic-con was Flash Gordon's arch nemisis: Doctor Evil Wedgie

The cult favorite Robert Smith Getting a Pretzel - Man was also there.

Of course what comic book convention would be complete without some guy holding his baby next to an amputee from a lame ass Quiefintarintino film?

And yes, this chick was actually an amputee unlike Rose McGowan (FAKER!) who needs all two of her legs to run away from her dwarf murderous son in Black Oasis ®coming soon to a DVD near you.

So far we have all check marks on the roll call of this fr3ak f3st. Snarf. Bee Tea Dub: Snarf.blogspot.com was taken. Whiskey Tango Foxtrot??? Who the hell has snarf.blogspot.com? Raphael doesn't even know the Lion-O connection.

Anyway... here are some more pictures from the show, and equally palpable obscure comments.

Darth Equis and his sidekick Dildo TP Rabbit Pelt Boy

Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, and Indiana Jones, and Indiana Jones and Indiana Jones and...

Optimus Prime

Seriously though, how cool was it they used the original voice for the movie? Yeah, about as cool as a Crouching Mac Truck Hidden Bazooka® domain name purchase.

Amid the myriad of toys there were these dildo

shaped penguins. Here's twice I'll use the word dildo in one blog. The cool thing about these is that they, and i'm quoting here, are "guaranteed to bring magic and mystery into the world." So I bought all four and am currently in litigation discussions with my lawyer(s). I doubt I'll have any luck though, as those 4 sales totalled their annual revenue for 2006. The only saving grace is that they are actually made out of real clubbed baby penguin hide.

What's cool about this guy is

A triple threat: TV Head Man, Purple Box Head and Body Man, and Space Helmet Man (not pictured).

Ok Ok, I know what you're thinking. Where are all the Star Wars freaks? Trust me they were there in full Force. snarrrf.

These guys were actually really nice. I asked if I could take their picture and they looked for a backdrop that would work better than just random people in the background. I was very impressed that they would go that far for my 2 MegaPixel Cannon and me. It must have been a slow day.

If you're thinking "Awww, a pink R2-D2. How cute!" You're so wrong you're like a Dick Cheney admission! This is - in fact - the O-riginal R2-KT built for a very cool cause.

Speaking of good causes, there are none for this. The only reasonable explanation is the Chiquita Banana went bad and turned to the dark side.

This was actually the first picture I took. If they were ever to do a child star version of Batman & Robin, this kid would definitely be in the first set of callbacks. As a stunt double for Dakota Fanning.

Here is the real life character that Andy Stitzer was based on from The 40 Year Old Virgin.

Also at Comic-Con 2007 was the Halo man the Halo game called Halo. I'm totally suprised Halo man didn't just shoot the crap out of everything. That's what I would do if I was the Halo man from the game Halo.

OK here's a story. I saw this guy's kicks on a table - and they had some hand drawings on it. At the time I was thinking I would add it to this blog with some cool reference to Turtle on Entourage, but the guy started talking to me about the shoes and how something something something, boring boring boring boring. And I totally lost my momentum. But they were cool kicks, and one of a kind like Episode 33 Season 3 What About Bob?

Each gaming system had their own booth. Playstation thought it would be a good idea to have a gigantic orgy of massive nipples as a game display holding thing. A veritible brochure rack made of teet.

Did I mention there were toys there? Here is just one of the seventy2 brazillion booths and the scores of swanky swag that can be yours if the price is right. Did I mention that some of the toys were really really weird?



































These are USB thumb drives. I think the largest they had was 4GB and shaped like a rip off. I mean seriously, $400 for a thumb drive? I don't give a rats ass if they were hand painted by midgets with gypsy tears.























Now we're getting some where. These mutated Placenta looking things were awesome! If I wasn't married - 30 years old - and not a self respecting adult - I would totally have bought them all. Fully.














This one seriously looked like a 3rd term mutant fetus abortion gone wrong.




















This one has an acne ridden orange for a head, bulging pink glowing eyes, and the standard issue freaky veiny worm with a blue tail for a tounge. Awesome!






























No idea what these are. Enjoy.

















Surprisingly I didn't see that many Trekkies. I did catch Kruge talking on his cell phone. Talk about out of character. He was kind enough to point me to this website that details actual living Klingons in the world around us. It's surprising how many there are! Check it out: http://www.famousklingons.com/

Speaking of - this right here is a limited edition StarTrek II the Wrath of Khan action figure. It's more of a "figure" and less action - because it has a whopping 2% motion range. The trick was - in order to be able to obtain one of these precious limited quantity jems you had to either:

A) Purchase the following Wrath of Khan "action" figures at various booths around the convention for $15 plus tax each

1) Sulu

2) Bones McCoy

3) Scotty

This would entitle you to purchase the above pictured figure for another $15.

or

B) Grab one and run like I did!

The wiser man would have chosen C) Grow up and wait for it to go on sale on Ebay for $7.95 in twelve years. Spending that night in jail for attempted shoplifting was totally not worth it. Who knew the Elite security team could run so fast? Khhhaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnn!

Well - that's all from Comic-Con 2007. I leave you with this picture of Evil Homer, the last picture I took as my batteries ran out. I would have taken more... A lot more... but I couldn't find batteries anywhere. And after covering the 2390470 square feet of the convention center searching, I was not about to go down 5th and get some batteries. So I just took mental pictures the rest of the day that I'm still trying to erase. Late.